Once again, it appears that I have failed packing. Last year when Lesley and I went to Istanbul, I forgot some of the basics. I should know better than to leave the USA without long black pants (I had black capris), a plain black skirt below my knees, I had a “little” black dress, some t-shirts…I’ve had experience, I know what to put in a carry on suitcase. What the hell was I thinking?
On September 1 I embarked on another journey that I thought I had packed for. Haha! Guess what? I had, and probably still have, absolutely no idea what to expect for this journey. Because, this time, I’m not packing for how hot it may be somewhere, I’m not packing for what may be more acceptable dress for a woman in a culture different from mine.
You’re packing a suitcase for a place
None of us has been
A place that has to be believed
To be seen
(Bono/U2 – Walk On)
On September 1, I started a 30 day physical challenge to practice yoga and pilates every day. The purpose is to raise awareness and money for famine relief for the Horn of Africa. Those of you who know me know I’m not a disaster relief kind of person. My focus is on after the relief organizations have come and gone, after the attention is off the disaster or problem…then I think rebuilding civil society is so critical, helping to create sustainable, self sufficient solutions in response to disasters.
I digress. My point to all this is, I was prepared for the physical part – thinking I would be tired, sore, physically inefficient. I was not prepared at all for the mental and spiritual journey I’ve found myself on. It reminds me of when I returned to college at the ripe young and fabulous age of 50…I figured I wouldn’t be smart enough, that the other younger, traditional students wouldn’t accept me; but it never occurred to me that returning to college would entirely upset my personal apple cart, change my worldview entirely. Right now, I find myself a little more emotionally fragile, perhaps a little more vulnerable – something I’m not totally comfortable with. But I find I am filled with such joy; I am finding such incredible pleasure in the practice of yoga. I have the most amazing opportunity – through myself I can help others. Is that really a possibility?
Yesterday after I dropped my car at the repair store for new tires and an oil change I chose to walk the two miles home. As I walked, I began to think about how irritated I was that my husband wasn’t available to pick me up, that the lady who takes customers home wasn’t there, right at the moment I wanted a ride home. As I walked, I thought about the women and children in the Horn of Africa, particularly those who are walking 28 days to hopefully get to food and safety before they, or their children, die. As I walked, I wondered what would happen if my neighborhood of 95 homes had to all leave and begin a journey, on foot, that might cost all of us our lives. I imagined what the exodus from my neighborhood would look like. How can you even begin to explain that? How can you even begin to justify that?
I’m 10 days into my 30 day challenge. Wonder what it will feel like at 30 days?
nbb
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